This one is a little different… . Two Different Versions… ……… …. 

Two Different Morals

OLD VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away..

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

MODERN VERSION
The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.
CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grass-hopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries when they sing, ‘It’s Not Easy Being Green.’
ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant’s house where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome " . Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshoppers  sake.
President Obama condemns the ant and blames President Bush, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the Pope for the grasshopper’s plight.
Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share..
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends finishing up the last bits of the ant’s food while the government house he is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant’s old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn’t maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperous and once peaceful, neighborhood.
The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2010.

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After months of negotiation with the authorities, a Talmudist from
Odessa was finally granted permission to visit Moscow.  He boarded the train
and found an empty seat.

At the next stop, a young man got on and sat next to him.

The scholar looked at the young man and he thought: This fellow doesn’t
look like a peasant, so if he is no peasant he probably comes from this
district.  If he comes from this district, then he must be Jewish because this is,
after all, a Jewish district.

But on the other hand, since he is a Jew, where could he be going? I’m
the only Jew in our district who has permission to travel to Moscow .

Ahh, wait! Just outside Moscow there is a little village called Samvet,
and Jews don’t need special permission to go to Samvet.  But why would
he travel to Samvet?  He is surely going to visit one of the Jewish families there.

But how many Jewish families are there in Samvet?  Aha, only two – the
Bernsteins and the Steinbergs.  But since the Bernstein’s are a terrible family,
so such a nice looking fellow like him, he must be visiting the Steinbergs.

But why is he going to the Steinbergs in Samvet?  The Steinbergs have
only daughters, two of them, so maybe he’s their son-in-law.

But if he is, then which daughter did he marry?

They say that Sarah Steinberg married a nice lawyer from Budapest , and
Esther married a businessman from Zhitomer, so it must be Sarah’s
husband.  Which means that his name is Alexander Cohen, if I’m not mistaken.

But if he came from Budapest , with all the anti-Semitism they have
there, he must have changed his name.  What’s the Hungarian equivalent
of Cohen?  It is Kovacs.

But since they allowed him to change his name, he must have special
status to change it.  What could it be?  Must be a doctorate from the
University. Nothing less would do.

At this point, therefore, the scholar of Talmud turns to the young man
and says, "Excuse me. Do you mind if I open the window, Dr.  Kovacs?"

"Not all," answered the startled co-passenger. "But how is it that you
know my name?"

"Ahhh," replied the Talmudist, "It was obvious."